tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6540834217224893682024-03-06T00:51:21.860-08:00The Backyard MissionaryBlogger and speaker, Sarah Slanzi is encouraging women to seek stillness, reconnect with family, and rest in God.The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-46560108335399742612020-03-14T11:09:00.000-07:002020-03-14T11:09:08.852-07:00One Thing for Christians to Remember in the Midst of Pandemic<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It is safe to say that several times this week we have been bombarded with stories of growing fear over the Covid-19 flu. We have been witnessing an odd display of unnecessary purchases of toilet paper, canned goods, and soap, we have heard countless theories of triggered the problem, as well as equally alarming counter retorts for every theory put forward from media. What caused this? How can we stop this? What if…what if…what if…</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">With theories running high and opinions galore being spread by anyone from doctors, to your average Joe down the road, I want to take a minute and remind us of the battle we are really facing (and it isn’t one of a virus).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We are in a battle zone, and one that we have been in since the first sin began to tarnish the face of the earth. Remember these verses?</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.</i><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>(Eph 6:10-12)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Our battle is not against the virus, nor the theories circling it, nor are we to scramble for toilet paper with the masses. The battle is for our minds and souls, and I fear we have lost sight of this and been sucked into the vortex of fear (at the very least our own curiosity has drawn us into the storm). Paul reminds us of a truth we could all use a little more of right now, myself included:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.</i> (Phil 4:8-9)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Our minds are being bombarded daily with hype, and fear, and stress, and worry over the unknown. Isn’t that exactly where our enemy wants for us? His goal is to cause us to lose sight over what is good and lovely, that being our Sovereign, most powerful, most capable God. This is the same God who gives peace in the storm. When we meditate on God’s goodness, holiness, and power our view shifts away from the media paranoia and we regain the peace of God. Armed with the peace which passes all understanding we can withstand this storm with grace and love intact. We can extend that peace, grace, and love to those around us who need help, prayers, and a calm voice among the frenzy. God's peace walked out through his children will be a healing balm to the nervous souls of those scattered around us. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We need to be extra cautious during this season to not wander to ponder all that is not life-giving, for where our thoughts are, so is our heart, and so is our attention. </span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Let’s take a deep breath and give our attention back to our most holy and most capable King of Kings, the one we get to call our Abba!</span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>O Lord, our Lord,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>How majestic is Your name in all the earth,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>Who have displayed Your splendor above the heavens!</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>From the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have established strength</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>Because of Your adversaries,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>To make the enemy and the revengeful cease.</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>The moon and the stars, which You have ordained;</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>What is man that You take thought of him,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>And the son of man that You care for him?</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>Yet You have made him a little lower than God,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>And You crown him with glory and majesty!</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>You make him to rule over the works of Your hands;</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>You have put all things under his feet,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>All sheep and oxen,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>And also the beasts of the field,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>The birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>Whatever passes through the paths of the seas.</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>O Lord, our Lord,</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>How majestic is Your name in all the earth!</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><i>Psalm 8</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1" style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Love,</span></span></div>
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The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-53332321271933193692020-01-06T21:43:00.001-08:002020-01-08T00:42:22.535-08:00The Need to Reignite Wonder in Adulthood<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBJzNpTUvZsna-uaNHGNcOyb6is5qd2oLnaM3hYpoYXc4ECtSfPORYnxPRmoiLThX_-KA0skjX1KBb15Vs5VSqXpcaPHILNBddGayrwPIfk5iq_kxdt8vMm6LQAlgBxJbVB-gk7JCd1f0/s1600/childhood+wonder.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img alt="wonder for adults" border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBJzNpTUvZsna-uaNHGNcOyb6is5qd2oLnaM3hYpoYXc4ECtSfPORYnxPRmoiLThX_-KA0skjX1KBb15Vs5VSqXpcaPHILNBddGayrwPIfk5iq_kxdt8vMm6LQAlgBxJbVB-gk7JCd1f0/s640/childhood+wonder.jpg" title="the need for wonder in adulthood" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">photo credit: The Backyard Missionary</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Holding my grandmother’s hand we walked up the stairs and down the long dark corridor to her bedroom. As she quietly rummaged through dresser drawers to find a missing birthday card for the recipient in waiting I stood in the middle of her room. My grandma was an artist and knew the most valuable aspect of any exceptional piece of art: light. It was artistic wisdom that I would later inherit as I fell in love with photography and have been chasing the beauty of light ever since. Her home was filled with strategically crafted light that would entice you to linger in any corner of her house. Her bedroom was no exception. As I stood there waiting, I watched the light from her two small lamps dance around the room kissing every surface with a warm and inviting glow. Absorbing that moment with all my senses I can still tell you the smell of her perfume that night, the feel of the soft wrinkly carpet under my tiny feet, the sound of her quiet breath as she rustled through papers, the muffled sound of the birthday party voices one floor below. Like a picture frozen in time, yet oddly interactive, it's permanently placed in my memory storage bank. It was a moment of childhood wonder that has become a part of my mental photo album of younger years.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">This Christmas we sat in that very home, my Grandma no longer with us, my Grandpa weathered by time. I looked around the living room and could see the ghosts of moments from time gone past in every corner. Once again, the wonder of childhood washed over me, soothing my soul like the quiet hush of my grandmother’s voice that I so dearly miss. It occurred to me in that moment how my rushed life had crept in and stolen my sense of wonder. No longer driven by curiosity the need to complete the mundane and move on has taken over.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I watched my kids as they vibrated with excitement from the day, so tired, and yet, unwilling to stop absorbing the sweetness of the day unfolding around them. I knew that night would be etched forever in their scrapbook of life hidden away in their hearts, and I wished that their sense of wonder would linger, knowing fully that if not protected it too would fade.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">What is wonder?</span></b></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Wonder is that moment where curiosity, awe, and amazement collide. A moment where our brains are challenged to absorb such extraordinary beauty unravelling in front of us. Just for a moment our breathing is slowed, our eyes are wide, and hearts are filled to the brim with contentment so full it’s almost too much to hold. The fullness of wonder often leaking from our eyes as we cry tears of shear delight.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Wonder is a gift from God, a small treasure from Heaven. It subtly arrives in the unexpected and interrupts the mundane. For a brief moment we are blanketed in fascination and awe as God reveals the most stunning display around us.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Wonder is placed in everyone of us, partly in anticipation for a time when we will stand before a glassy sea gazing into the fiery eyes of God himself. Can you imagine the wonder we will have when we witness this extraordinary scene for the first time?</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>At once I was in the Spirit, and behold, a throne stood in heaven, with one seated on the throne. And he who sat there had the appearance of jasper and carnelian, and around the throne was a rainbow that had the appearance of an emerald. Around the throne were twenty-four thrones, and seated on the thrones were twenty-four elders, clothed in white garments, with golden crowns on their heads. From the throne came flashes of lightning, and rumblings and peals of thunder, and before the throne were burning seven torches of fire, which are the seven spirits of God, and before the throne there was as it were a sea of glass, like crystal. And around the throne, on each side of the throne, are four living creatures, full of eyes in front and behind…</i>(Rev. 4:2-6)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Wonder is also for right now.</span></b></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">God never meant for wonder to fade with childhood. He meant it to spur us on in awe and amazement of him. Have you ever starred up at the billions of stars on a clear night and been in awe at how many there were? Have you ever stood on the edge of the ocean and listened to the roar of the waves? How about those few seconds of witnessing a baby fill their lungs with the first breath of life? These moment were meant to stir awe in us. They were to ignite a sense of wonder as we stop in the ordinary and long for the extraordinary. Like fuel for our empty tanks, they are sweet drops of Heaven embedding themselves into our hearts, refuelling our worship, and replenishing our joy.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As adults we must intentionally slow down our lives and reignite this wonder. It strengthens our faith, it deepens our knowledge of God. The rolling thunder across the prairie allows us to hear his power. The brilliance of a harvest sunset reveals the smallest of glimpses of His beauty. The intricacy of a single snowflake reveals how important even the most minute of details are to God. Each one of these a reflection of a time to come. A time when wonder will be in every waking aspect of our lives as we walk in the cool of the evenings once again with God.</span></span></div>
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It’s time to slow down and wonder.</span></b></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As a mom I have the benefit of children to help me to see wonder. I can watch them, and take my cue from them. Why have they stopped? What are they gazing at so intently? Their childhood wisdom is bestowed upon me if only I am willing to stop moving and look with them. Wonder is readily given, but only if we are willing to trust God to hold time for the briefest moments (or longer should we be drawn in to linger). Whether your kids are young or grown, the call remains the same. Slow down, wonder at the amazing beauty of the glimpse of God’s goodness in every corner of our world. Gaze with delight at the Heavenly treasures found in the ordinary hours of the day.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>And amazement seized them all, and they glorified God and were filled with awe, saying, “We have seen extraordinary things today.”</i><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">(Luke 5:26)</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Love,</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Sarah</span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-54416022418778538942020-01-01T13:37:00.002-08:002020-01-02T10:21:06.271-08:0030-something and Feeling Lost in Motherhood<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCYrLQLH2J27tcIOiFfUna-cPyQ2leJ7d9QCvexAjJsjGrL6FjQS9TuMlBrxqB7saJf1UQftTwjawxk67-eenw4X8WUjH1rANaVTeX81IC5V89xzELTDLIh36TAgT9JNKk2ZX2ter9q3o/s1600/overwhelmed+in+motherhood.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="slow down and be less busy as a mom" border="0" data-original-height="1065" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCYrLQLH2J27tcIOiFfUna-cPyQ2leJ7d9QCvexAjJsjGrL6FjQS9TuMlBrxqB7saJf1UQftTwjawxk67-eenw4X8WUjH1rANaVTeX81IC5V89xzELTDLIh36TAgT9JNKk2ZX2ter9q3o/s640/overwhelmed+in+motherhood.jpg" title="Lost in motherhood" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I just took two Advil, cranked the heat in the house, and dragged my sorry carcass, complete with mascara-smeared cheeks, and a now side-ways ponytail to my computer desk to write for a brief moment while my husband graciously took the kids out so I could have a much needed time-out. Run-on sentence? Yup. Am I going to fix it? Nope.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I just finished taking a marketing class in effort to understand social media. Can I just say that it makes me feel ultra-old that I need someone to tell me how to work social media? I won’t even tell you how much it has made my head hurt these past few weeks. But you know what the worst portion was? All the talk about finding your niche.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Questions for finding your niche part one: what is that you can talk about all day? Hmm…I’ve been a mom for so long that the only thing I know how to talk about is motherhood. And I’ll probably do it in short sentences so a four year old can follow along. Don’t mind me if I insert a few “good girls” or “atta boys” into my conversation (be grateful you aren't sitting next me or you might find yourself with a pat on the head or a high five just because I love you).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Next niche finding question posed to my struggling brain: what lights you up when you talk about it? There’s the real kicker because here’s the thing, I could tell you all about motherhood, I could tell you about being a parent and all the lovely things about it. I could talk about the importance of getting out on date nights to keep the sparkle alive. But at the end of the day, I’m tired. Just.Plain.Tired. I’m tired of talking about making meals, doing laundry, driving people to every event that ever there was. I’m tired of talking about the struggles of getting a four year old to wear mitts (the battle is real folks!).</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It took me awhile to process all these deep and philosophical questions as I began to realize that I couldn't answer them for my business because I couldn't answer them for myself. A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away (there might be a little Star Wars excitement brewing in our house), there lived a young lady who knew what she wanted to do and what lit her up. But then, motherhood rolled in a like tanker and she got to work. Life sped up leaving very little room to process. Somewhere in the chaos and sleepless nights she got lost. I got lost, like really lost!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My dad recently commented upon asking how my life was going that I sure had a lot of balls in the air. He was right, and that comment stung deeper than his nonchalant attitude obviously intended to. Call it desperation, or call it clutter, either way I realized I had put way too much in the books in effort to give myself value. Dad had pulled the thread and it only unravelled from there. I realized that I had started to cling to every little sparkle of life that past me by (because everything felt like it was passing by while I stood frozen in an endless cycle of "mom-life". Do I sound as depressed in writing as it seems when I read this back to myself? I assure you I'm not certifiably crazy...or is that what crazy people say?!).</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Hang on...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Just had to chase a dog around my basement to pull an old bandaid out of her mouth. *sigh* See? Not exactly material worth lighting up for...or is it?</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My dad was onto something. He shone light on the very issue at hand that I hadn't realized was even there...my world is so chalked full of clutter that I can’t see what’s important anymore! I had been trying to measure my value by doing more. I paused and thought back to my younger version of me. The version of me that seems more relaxed, more confident. You know what that younger version of me had that I don't have now (other than amazing abs and a belly button that doesn't look like an inverted deflated ballon)? Time. She had time.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="s1">The beauty of the gift of time is that it soothes a restless soul and causes us to see the God-given beauty around us. I'm not talking about the beauty of soft, dewy light of the early morning streaming through your window, as poetic as that is to say. I'm talking about the beauty of a simple life lived with God. I have become weary, not because motherhood is a burden, but because I have cluttered the expectations of mom-life with worldly clutter that tells me to do more or run the risk of failing myself, my family, my husband, the community, the church, the world, </span>the dog, the neighbour's cat</span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">…you get the point.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">So, Mr. Questions #2, what makes me light up you say? Well, quite frankly Jesus, but for the most part I'd say he faded into the background as I created a bizarre and frantic version of what I perceived motherhood to be. There He is disappearing into the background of my three ring circus. Sometimes I lay down at night to pray and I wonder why He seems so distant and where my Light has disappeared to. I get so wrapped up in "busy" attempting to find something that gives life forgetting that He IS the life and light (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+1%3A4&version=ESV" target="_blank">John 1:4</a>). He really is all I need. He really does give me value, and not because I’ve strategically filled a calendar with lovely events to fill our days with, nor because I have created some amazing ministry. Busy does not make God proud of me. He is proud of me simply because He knows how much I love Him. He values me just because I am His.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I had a friend on why her most precious moments with God are in the middle of the night. The answer is simple: time, silence, zero distractions. That's why.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">God never meant for us to run frantically from one spot to another. The Bible doesn't tell us to schedule our weeks to give our kids the most opportunities we can possibly jam into the week to round them out. God's word certainly doesn't say "do it all." Nope. None of it. Whatever you've made motherhood out to be, if it's frantic and has left you deplete, it wasn't in God's plans. He didn't ask you to live that life. And yes, younger version of me, I can still have time, even in motherhood!</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Here's what God does have to say to us weary mothers who are years into this gig and wondering how we are still standing:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The world puts busy on a pedestal. We applaud the moms who keep a clean house, explore the world with their children, and bake 5 dozen cookies for the bake sale all in one day. You know what I know for certain about those moms? They are tired too. It's just too much. It's a burden we were never meant to carry, and one I'm not willing to carrying with me into this new year. I'm laying "busyness" at the foot of the cross and refusing to pick it up again. </span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I'm not one to have a "word" that sets the tone for my year, but this year I'm picking one (well, actually two because I don't feel like pulling out a thesaurus to work it out): </span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: medium;"><i>slow down</i></b><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">This year, I'm setting out to step back and slow down. I'm saying so long to the Joneses who I no longer desire to keep up with. I might lose a friend or two along the way who don’t like slowing down, that’s ok. God won’t leave my side, and right now it’s Him I need more than people. I’m waving farewell to my addiction of busy, as it has made me sick in the worst way possible. I'm reclaiming my time to be still and do less. </span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I'm going to move forward into the new year with the notion that God's burden is light (even in motherhood). If I am going to seek, hear, and learn from Him as He calls me to, then I need space to breath and be still. I need to declutter my world including my expectations on myself.</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I invite you to join me this year as I take this journey to seek the stillness of life alongside Jesus in a frantic world to both serve and honour God from a place of rest. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Love,</span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-20741588142662850562019-12-11T22:06:00.000-08:002019-12-11T22:06:49.437-08:00[VLOG] A Health Update and a Little Hope <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/23XT9Fs2qgQ/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/23XT9Fs2qgQ?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
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Hi Friends,<br />
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Some of you have been following along with my crazy health journey this year and wondering how it's been going. First, I wanted to take a moment and say thank you for all your prayers and support this past year! Your kind words and most certainly your prayers have been propping me up through this difficult journey.<br />
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Moving forward, it seems as though I finally have some answers in a way that only God could do. I have shared the update with you in the video above. I was just going to share this with my family and close friends, but then I realized it is a message of hope and wanted to share it with all of you. Who doesn't need to hear a message of hope, really?!<br />
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For those of you who are wondering what on earth I'm talking about, that's ok, I'll fill you in as well in the video clip.<br />
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Love you all!<br />
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-21211948507786033852019-11-21T22:13:00.001-08:002019-11-22T13:59:53.565-08:00One Important Lesson my Pup Taught me About the Good Shepherd<style type="text/css">
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Meet Ollie our newest family member. Today Ollie taught me a little thing about shepherding. You see, Ollie is an Australian Shepherd and was born to herd animals. She has quickly become familiar with who her pack/herd/flock/whatever you want to call her family around here.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Today my son, Asher, and I took Ollie for one of her daily walks. About halfway through our walk Asher wasn’t feeling super, let’s just say that walking in snow pants and boots when you are only four years old tires out a guy pretty quickly! Rather than fight the boy’s need to sit every 5 steps, I decided to take a shortcut home. He was relieved to be out of his multiple layers of winter gear, I was relieved to be able to pick up the pace, and so I left him in the care of his two big sister to finish running the dog.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As we left our home for our walk-part-2 it became evident that Ollie was in distress. She kept pulling at her leash in the opposite direction to me. After much frustration, on both our parts, she sat down and refused to budge. I proceeded to ask her what was wrong, because, if you have pets, naturally you assume they will respond in english. “Well Sarah, I feel as though our vision for this outing is not currently compatible…oooo!! ooOO!!! KITTY!!”<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">That’s not exactly how it went down, but she did jump at my legs and try to pull me towards home. Close enough, am I right?! I’m sure I broke every obedience training lesson in the book, but curiosity got the best of me and I’m glad it did!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I let her lead ever so slightly to see where she would take me. She led me across the road, down the block, and right up our sidewalk. I opened the door and she ran in searching for Asher. When she found him she sat down beside him, look at me, and sighed with a huge sigh of contentment knowing she was right where she needed to be.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> Tail wags and a face wash for the boy followed.</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Her shepherding instinct was so strong that after we dropped off Asher she recognized one of us was missing and she needed to find him and ensure we were all safely back together. Her desire to be with him outweighed her desire for a good walk. <b>Together was better, whatever the cost</b>.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As I thought of how diligently Ollie fought to turn back to get to Asher I thought of our own Good Shepherd. Not just once but twice do we get to hear the parable of the lost sheep, once in Matthew 18, and again in Luke 15. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.</i> (Matt 18:12-14)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The fight that my young pup had to get back to her “lost sheep” was nothing compared to the fight from God for the lost. While my pup was willing to give up her precious walk to be together, the Good Shepherd was willing to give up his life. T<b>ogether is better, whatever the cost.</b><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Today Ollie gave me a tiny dog-sized visual of the deep love our Father has for us, His sheep. Nothing and no one can distract Him from us, nothing and no one can persuade Him away from us, nothing and no one can use enough brute force to pull us away from Him. What hope we can have for our lost loved ones knowing that God is chasing down His missing sheep. What rest and comfort we can find in our own lives knowing we can lay down and be securely tucked away in the protection of God’s presence. <b>Together is always better.</b></span></span></div>
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Love,<br />
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-33384044872049867042019-09-25T21:18:00.000-07:002019-09-25T21:19:08.316-07:00The Cost of Abundance<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">“I forgot why I don’t like shopping here,” she muttered as we stood at the checkout stand. “You have to bag your own groceries.”</span></span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">I laughed, “Well, at least it isn’t Costco where we have to haul out heavy boxes.”</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">She chuckled then shook her head, “We are so privileged.”</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">She was right. We finished packing our bags and parted ways. I walked to my car thinking of the privilege it is to be able to buy giant boxfuls of food.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Opening the trunk to my car, I realized I had no space to put my food because I hadn’t taken the bags of clothes we had just cleaned out of our closets to Goodwill yet. A trunk full of too many clothes left me with no room for my shopping cart full of food. Quite the first world predicament.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">I checked my grumpy attitude I’ve had the last few days as we’ve been working to declutter (why is getting rid of so much abundance so exhausting?) and thought about all this. God put me here, in Canada. I could have been born in a third world. I could have even been one of the less fortunate in my own city, but here I am staring at my car filled with surplus.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">God says much will be required to those of us who have plenty. (</span><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke+12%3A48&version=ESV" style="color: #222222;" target="_blank">Luke 12:48</a><span style="color: #222222;">) Based on the space in my car I’m in the “plenty” group, and I'm fairly certain a car, empty or full, is enough to land me in this category. And yet, how many times have I missed an opportunity because I’ve been grumbling over what I have? Have I missed a conversation God needed me to have with the sales clerk because I was too busy bagging my surplus of food like it was some sort of hardship? Did I miss a chance with a stranger because I was in a hurry for my kids dance lesson forgetting that sports aren't a need in God's kingdom? Did I absentmindedly miss someone in need on the street corner because my gas tank was low and I was too busy comparing which stations had the cheapest gas rate? </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">Have my privileges distracted me from God’s needs?</span></span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">God needs us in the ordinary. He need us to look up from the plenty we have and notice those right in front of us. It is a privilege to buy groceries, to have our kids in sports, to drive cars (just to name a few). Those privileges perfectly take us to places where God needs us to be. He needs our mouths to be ready to speak for Him, our hands to be ready to help Him, our feet to be ready to move for Him, and our ears to listen attentively like He does for us. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">Today wasn’t just a reminder to be grateful for all that I’ve been given, it was a reminder to look up and to look around instead of falling prey to being stuck in the privileged routine of an ordinary first world life. It was a reminder that I have been given much at the hand of God, but that that requires much from me. There is joy far greater in serving God than in any earthly abundance anyway. </span></span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Someone around you today needs you to stop fussing over the privileges and abundance of everyday life and bust into their world with words and actions like only God can do. Will you look up?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">love,</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">photo credit: rawpixel.com @pexels.com</span></span>The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-26933224086618144122019-05-23T23:14:00.000-07:002020-01-03T22:33:46.738-08:00The Day My Pregnancy Was Terminated<style type="text/css">
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Today is May 24th which for most of you it’s just an ordinary day. But for me, May 24th is a day of remembrance. On this day in 2005 my 8 week pregnancy was terminated and my heart beating baby was removed from my body. As I write this my heart is racing and my hands are trembling as I think back to the day that placed a weight in my heart that I will forever carry with me.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I can remember the day like yesterday. I had been bleeding throughout my pregnancy on and off. I was finally sent for an ultrasound early one morning after a visit to the ER the night before found my uterus was not as large as it should’ve been for 8 weeks pregnant. The ultrasound tech’s furrowed brow and the sharp pain of the probe she kept prodding me with told me something wasn't right. She left me alone, I assume to consult with the doctor, or radiologist, or whoever knows how to officially read the black smudges on the screen. I laid in the room listening to myself breath in the hopes of a welcoming distraction in the silence. Just a few days prior my mom and I had gone to the fabric store to buy fabric for the baby’s room- cowboy and farm print. My dreams for our family had been sweet, but the sinking feeling surrounding the day was causing them to fade in the most painful way possible.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Go home and wait by your phone,” was all she said.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Although my husband and I only lived 5 minutes from the clinic, by the time we opened the front door the phone was ringing. It was my family doctor.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Sarah, your baby is alive and has a heartbeat, but is growing in your tube. I’m calling ahead to the hospital. You’ll be having surgery today to remove the child before your tube ruptures and you hemorrhage. You must go there right away.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">There was a hum in my ears as she spoke. The sounds of our home become muffled by the questions that had began to circle so furiously in my head, I could barely hear my husband speak to me. To this day, I have no idea what he said in that moment. I called my mom to tell her, though I don’t remember what I said, I do remember her saying something about meeting us at the hospital.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">We entered the ER for the second time in a 24 hour period, this time all hope of hearing the words I desperately needed to hear were gone. I was taken into a room and given a gown. There were swarms of nurses in and out of the room, the bustle never seemed to ease up. I was rushed for another ultrasound. They decided against a second one as quickly as they had wheeled me down the hall. I was taken back to the room where a team of nurses was waiting, one began to collect blood on one arm, another began to hook me up to an IV on the other arm. The IV didn’t work and within minutes my arm began to swell as fluid filled my arm. More nurses came pouring in.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“I don’t feel well,” was all I could get out. Those words prompted more blood work to ensure I wasn’t turning septic. It had nothing to do with being septic. I was suffocating in the swirl of medical personnel. I was drowning in the chaos, but there was no time to come up for air. Down and down I went, further to the bottom of the sea of IVs, stretchers, hospital smells, and medical jargon. Down and down I went from the blissful anticipation of being a new mom, to a heartbroken mother grieving unexpected loss rather than the expected gain. I wouldn’t leave the hospital with a baby in my arms as I had envisioned. I would leave the hospital empty-handed. Vacant. Void of the life I had brought in with me.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I was taken up to what would become my post-op room and signed off on the surgical papers. You know the ones that warn you that you may never wake up. My life, my baby’s life, the preciousness of life was at a stand still.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">For the first time since the ultrasound that morning I was left in an empty room as we waited for the porter to come to take me into the surgical room. I lay there quietly rubbing my hand over the left side of my swollen abdomen where baby was peacefully nestled.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“How do you tell the child you've never met that it will be ok?” I whispered into the quiet room.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My husband stepped out to breath for a brief minute, and just Mom and I lingered in the room. Two mothers grieving for their children.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I pushed my hand deep into my belly and asked my mom to put her hand on top of mine, I was desperate for validation from someone else to recognize the budding human growing inside me. Only the surgeons would bear witness to the sacred life my eyes would never see. There we sat, quietly speaking to baby and praying to God.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The porter arrived. Every ounce of air from my lungs was instantly sucked from my body. This was it.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Laying on the stretcher outside the operating room the surgeons arrived, a husband and wife team. As the Mrs. washed her hands the Mr. stood beside me.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Will this hurt the baby?” I asked.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“It’s just group of cells, not a real baby. It won’t hurt anything.” His answer shocked me. This was <i>my</i> baby! The baby I had been speaking to for the last few weeks of my life.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“But my baby has a heartbeat,“ I pleaded.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“The heartbeat is only the result of electric pulses and nothing more.” His response was almost as sterile as the room that surrounded me.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The Mrs. overheard and made her way to the other side of the stretcher, her response was only slightly more comforting.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Your baby feeds on your blood supply and will be under anesthetic just like you. It won’t feel anything and I’ll leave it inside you until we are finished.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">With that I was wheeled into the OR. My body shivered in the cold, steel room. Tears streamed down as my face and a few breaths later I was asleep.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The room seemed painfully bright as I came to from the anesthetic. The room was still just as busy as when I had gone to sleep, but, this time, there was one less person present. The emptiness in my body was unbearable.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">One week later my family gathered for a memorial service of our little Finch. Early in the pregnancy I gave the baby a nickname, Finch, like a little baby bird. A tiny, fragile life growing in the shelter of my body- a shelter that couldn’t save my Finch.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It has been 14 years since that day. I’ve had five more babies since then, though only 3 of them are living this side of Heaven.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As I thought about sharing this with you, I realized I still have unanswered questions and my mind still gets the best of me sometimes. What if I had said no to the surgery? What if I was given more time to get answers? Did I murder my baby?</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I can’t answer most of those questions. What I can do is share with you from the side of this pro-lifer. Even as I write “pro-lifer”, the nagging feeling of guilt still threatens to press upon my heart. <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><b>I write this first to my fellow pro-life advocates...</b><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">While my story falls in a rather odd category, you need to have heard my story. Most woman who have had an abortion feel the sharp pangs of your comments of “murderer”. She doesn’t roam the streets looking like a killer (whatever that looks like in your eyes). She looks like me. The girl next door. The lady you sit beside in church. The woman who is now a mother, grateful for the kids she has been given a second chance at. The woman with unseen hurt that she’s likely far too embarrassed to tell you about. This is her. Be gentle with her.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">God’s loving arms are gracious and full of mercy. His love is never-ending. As pro-life advocates we should never forget that <i>pro</i>-life includes <i>all</i> humans, not just the unborn. We are here to fight that all life should see their value and worth just as God has shown us. We are called to love our neighbours, called to reveal a God that offers forgiveness.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Some of these women are unable to see their own worth let alone the worth of what is growing in the sacred depths of their bodies. They don’t understand the depth of our Father’s love. When we shout profanities, shake our fists in rage, and crush spirits how will they ever know why we value life with such passion if we don’t first show them we value their life too? Speaking truth is no doubt part of God’s love, but truth without kindness will only stir up more strife (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=prov+15%3A1&version=ESV" target="_blank">Proverbs 15:1</a>). Let’s be quick to remember Paul’s beautiful letter of what it looks like to love one another as God has established for his Church.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>Love is <b>patient</b>, love is <b>kind</b> and is not jealous; love does not brag and <b>is not arrogant</b>,<b> does not act unbecomingly</b>; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but <b>rejoices with the truth</b>; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.</i> (1 Corinthians 13:4-7 emphasis my own)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">To the woman who has had an abortion...</span></b></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>I know your weight, your grief, your chains. I see you, I hear you. I know that while you’re trying to buy into the lie that you only removed a group of cells that in your heart you know the reality of the loss. There is hope for your burden, but it isn’t found in this world. It is found in God, the Father of both you, and of your child.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">We all make mistakes. We have all sinned, we have all missed the mark, and come up short of God’s glory (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=romans+3%3A23&version=ESV" target="_blank">Romans 3:23</a>). But God is a God of <i>grace</i> and<i> mercy</i> and <i>love</i>. He doesn’t just possess love, He is the very existence of love (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+John+4%3A7-21&version=ESV" target="_blank">1 John 4:7-21</a>).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>Love doesn’t keep records of wrongdoings after the apology has been offered. Unlike you or I who struggle with forgiveness, God is perfect, and He does not struggle. <a href="https://www.thebackyardmissionary.com/2018/10/if-god-is-so-loving-why-is-there.html" target="_blank">You can find freedom in His presence because He broke your chains on the cross</a>. No more condemnation, no more guilt. Just freedom to know you have been forgiven and can walk beside Him without the stain of blood on your hands.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Know this. There is an unimaginable burden that follows the conscious choice to end a life. I can only assume, like my story, that the speed of what is happening around you is moving too quickly. Like a runaway train, you are desperate to just make it stop moving, whatever the cost. Unless you are hemorrhaging on the spot, you have time. Take it. Breath. Pray. Repeat. Even if it’s just for an hour, shut the terrifying words of the doctors out of your head. Close your ears to those around you who are persuading you that taking a life is what’s best. Be still, and know that there is a God who knows far more than any doctor, far more than any diagnostic testing, far more than anyone around you. He is worth trusting, even if you barely know him. The entire Bible is a story of God’s redemption of a world crushed by our poor choices. If he can redeem a world, he can redeem your story whatever it may be. Breath Him in. Call to Him. Trust Him.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names. Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure.</i> (Psalms 147:4-5)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">If God knows the stars by their names, surely he has not forgotten you, nor your baby. He will not abandon you. You are not alone. I plead with you from the bottom of my heavy heart to reach out to a <a href="https://www.pregnancycarecentre.ca/" target="_blank">pregnancy support center</a>. At least listen to a second opinion. You owe it not just to your baby, but to yourself to hear from someone who honestly wants to hear your fears and concerns, and who long to help you make choices that you won’t regret. Many of them have already been praying for women just like you. They already love you before you’ve even walked through their door.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My story was and is complex. If I could go back, I would’ve done it differently. It really doesn’t matter though, the past is over and unchangeable. I grieve my loss often, as any mother who’s lost a child would. I hope and pray that someway, somehow, my sharing can change the outcome for someone else. I pray my voice can spare just one child. And, one day, when I make it to Heaven, I will kiss my beautiful Finch and tell my baby how we changed a life together. <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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photo credit: <a class="_3XzpS _1ByhS _4kjHg _1O9Y0 _3l__V _1CBrG xLon9" href="https://unsplash.com/@nynnes" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #111111; display: inline !important; font-family: -apple-system, system-ui, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 1.35; overflow: hidden; text-decoration-line: none; text-decoration-skip-ink: auto; text-overflow: ellipsis; transition: color 0.1s ease-in-out 0s, opacity 0.1s ease-in-out 0s; white-space: nowrap;">Nynne Schrøder</a> @ Unsplash.comThe Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-34917909192796864262019-05-08T21:38:00.000-07:002019-05-09T22:03:05.339-07:00When Good Health Became My Idol<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQwt76RBiqkAXII_pH0ObupnNvrSaxx6GhuEoHp76DrKQWp6FiRXO5lh6ikY5BJfhSFx1JQfPbHW_YiOH-M7R_PbUhYW_rhB2qVzv8WGz0h7vYE8Xgv5jR_DejyDuEHpkejgdq2I9lyd4/s1600/herbal+remedies+for+Christians.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christians and health" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQwt76RBiqkAXII_pH0ObupnNvrSaxx6GhuEoHp76DrKQWp6FiRXO5lh6ikY5BJfhSFx1JQfPbHW_YiOH-M7R_PbUhYW_rhB2qVzv8WGz0h7vYE8Xgv5jR_DejyDuEHpkejgdq2I9lyd4/s640/herbal+remedies+for+Christians.jpg" title="Can your health be an idol" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I never assumed my health could ever become an idol. I suppose I always took advantage of being a generally healthy person. It wasn’t until my good health was stripped from me with four months of a mysterious illness that I could see it for the idol that it had become.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I laid in my bed exhausted from carrying the sharp pangs of pain that daily coursed through every muscle and joint in my body. My brain could barely keep up with daily conversation, my heartbeat was irregular, and my blood pressure dropped so low the world would spin every time I stood up. I pleaded with God, “Lord, if you would just heal me than I can do more for You!” Yet, wave upon wave of my mysterious illness seemed to knock me over, and defeat was settling in.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Poor health was almost embarrassing to discuss among church friends, that should’ve been my first red flag that I had placed too much merit on this growing idol. I felt ashamed, like somehow I got it wrong and everyone else got it right. Admitting I was sick was like admitting my faith was weak. I knew that not to be true, but I couldn’t escape the feeling that I was a subpar Christian because my health took a hard hit. Looking back on it, I can see now that Good Health sat on a throne and became the dictator by which I measured my life with.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It wasn’t until I was allowed to struggle in my pain that a profound truth began to sink in. Freedom isn’t free <b><i>from</i></b>, it’s free <b><i>to</i></b>. I know what you’re thinking, and yes, we are free <i>from</i> sin, but when we became free from sin, we became free <i>to</i> love and be loved by God without interference. Freedom isn’t being free <b><i>from</i></b> sickness, overwhelming circumstances, disease, debt, etc., it’s being free <b><i>to</i></b> be loved by God. When the chain of your sin was broken by the Lamb, interference from God’s love was abolished for all your eternity.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>You do not need to be free from your circumstances to be free to love and be loved by God.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="s1">We pray “<i>IF</i> you...<i>THEN</i> I will...”, but sometimes our “if” doesn’t come, and if the “if” doesn’t come, we are no less saved, no less loved, and no less desired by God. </span><span class="s2">Your health will never distract God from his plan for your life. It will never cause him to place you on the back burner to make room for a healthier alternative.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>Who shall separate us </i><b><i>from the love of Christ</i></b><i>? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?... No,</i><b><i> in all these things</i></b><i> we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. </i>(Romans 8:35, 37 emphasis my own)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">In all these things, your distress, your persecution, your situations, you are conquerors through Christ. In your bed, wheelchair, pain, illness, less than ideal circumstances you are still prevailing. Why? Because not one single element of what plagues your life is enough to separate you from the freedom of receiving God’s love. Not one single aspect of your illness is enough to cause God to stumble in his desire to be near you. Not even a negative attitude is enough to push God away. In fact, I learned that as my misery grew, He drew closer.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="s1"><i>The LORD is </i><b><i>near to</i></b><i> the brokenhearted And </i><b><i>saves</i></b><i> those who are crushed in spirit.</i></span><span class="s3"><i> </i>(Psalm 34:18 emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Not even my misery was enough to turn God away from loving me, and being near to me.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Having good health as an idol assumed that every other aspect of my life depended on my health for me be worthy. In doing so it lowered God by assuming that he can’t possibly love me or use me if I am sick. It assumes we are useless if we are imperfect. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Wrong. Dead wrong. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">You are loved, you are desired, you are free.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. </i>(Romans 8:38-39)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">photo credit: freestocks.org @ pexels.com</span>The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-38816336354614571982019-03-24T22:31:00.002-07:002019-03-25T14:15:22.929-07:00From Embarrassed to Refined: How God Pulled me From my Hiding Place and Set the Record Straight<style type="text/css">
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Sitting in my chiropractor’s office having deep theological discussion, as we always do, he says something to the extent of this, “Can you imagine how Job must have felt demanding God to show up and defend why He let everything happen, then, in a bizarre turn of events, God actually shows up?!”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Embarrassed!” I shrieked, “and it isn’t always a bad thing!”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Rewind that story to a few months prior...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">We had been studying the book of James in our Bible study. As we read through chapter one this verse struck me:</span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="versenum" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> </span><i><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-30255J" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-30255J" title="See cross-reference J">J</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></i><span style="background-color: white; font-style: italic;">If any of you lacks wisdom, </span><i><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-30255K" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-30255K" title="See cross-reference K">K</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></i><span style="background-color: white; font-style: italic;">let him ask God, </span><i><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-30255L" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-30255L" title="See cross-reference L">L</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></i><span style="background-color: white;"><i>who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. </i>(James 1:5)</span></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">For weeks I wrestled with this question. What DID I want to know? Anticipation began to grow. I asked him a lot of varying different questions. I figured since the offer was there, I wanted to take full advantage of His generosity. But then something happened...He went silent. And I mean absolutely cricket chirping silent.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It grew challenging to read my Bible without it stirring my soul, challenging to pray when there were no answers or changes in what I prayed for. My heart grew tired and weary in what appeared to be His absence. I asked him, “Where did you go?” I thought that had become a rather important question to ask, but again, the only thing he offered me was more silence.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Soon an exhausting health crisis moved into our household. Three out of five of us went down hard. I prayed again for answers, well, actually, I just kept asking “why” a whole lot.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">One night, too exhausted to move, I slumped down on the couch and prayed an utterly weak and defeated prayer. Suddenly God began to shift my perspective. I began to realize that somewhere through the course of many layered events and multiple months I had shrunk God down in scale. I hadn’t doubted his existence, only his size. When I prayed I was praying (in my mind) to a God of microscopic stature, therefore I had very little expectation of what he was going to do with my prayers. Somewhere in this mix I had forgotten the power of the one whom I was praying to.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I finally knew my question.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“I want to know You are still powerful.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Ok, ok, it’s probably more of a statement than a question, but I suppose in reality God’s power did have a giant question mark hovering over it. Is God really that powerful? Does he still work miracles? The 24 hours that followed were nothing short of a Job moment where God himself showed up and reminded me repeatedly of his power.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">That night my husband and I randomly decided to watch a sermon before bed (not our usual bedtime routine). We typed in one of our favourite preacher’s name into the search bar on YouTube and up came the top three suggestions. The first title made something in me VERY nervous, so I told my husband to hit play on either of the other two selections. Neither worked. I’ll bet you can guess which one of the three did work though! I was already uncomfortable before the first word was even spoken. </span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Every single question that I had been hanging onto over the past few months was addressed in sequential form as the preacher spoke. Something that had been recorded months before I watched it (and on the other side of the world I might add) was being used in my home to answer my tiny questions that had yet to be answered. Every piece of scripture that had been at the forefront of my mind was used over the course of the next 30 minutes. I felt like crawling under my blankets and hiding!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>I kept hitting pause just to catch my breath. God has been listening even when I thought he had gone silent. I wasn't watching a 30 minute coincidence, I was witnessing God's power in action.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">A few days later I was overwhelmed by an outpouring of prayers and encouragement from people I hadn’t met before at our church. People who were being prompted to pray for our family at hours of the night that overlapped with moments when I would wake in pain or anxiety from my own health problems. People who unknowingly spoke words of life that struck right to the core of the matters of our heart. God showed up in all His power and glory and sheepish doesn’t even begin to describe how it felt!</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Then the Lord answered Job out of the whirlwind and said,</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Who is this that darkens counsel<br />
By words without knowledge?</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Now gird up your loins like a man,<br />
And I will ask you, and you instruct Me!</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?<br />
Tell Me, if you have understanding,</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Who set its measurements? Since you know.<br />
Or who stretched the line on it?</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“On what were its bases sunk?<br />
Or who laid its cornerstone...</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Have you ever in your life commanded the morning,<br />
And caused the dawn to know its place,</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">That it might take hold of the ends of the earth,<br />
And the wicked be shaken out of it?</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“It is changed like clay under the seal;<br />
And they stand forth like a garment.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“From the wicked their light is withheld,<br />
And the uplifted arm is broken.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Have you entered into the springs of the sea<br />
Or walked in the recesses of the deep?</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Have the gates of death been revealed to you,<br />
Or have you seen the gates of deep darkness?</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“Have you understood the expanse of the earth?<br />
Tell Me, if you know all this.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">(Job 38:1-6, 12-18)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I can almost hear the sound of sarcasm in God’s voice as He talked to Job. “Have YOU understood the expanse of the earth? Hmmm?? Tell Me, if you know all this.” I can see God sort of leaning with His elbow propped atop the tallest tree, eyebrows raised.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Embarrassed. Yup. Job felt embarrassed. I know, because I certainly did. By the time God got through revealing His power and might my knees were trembling in fear of His greatness.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">He had not answered my other questions prior to that day because they did not get to the core of where my heart needed stability. All valid questions, but in true God form He knew what I really needed to know before my “big” question was even asked. And, in true God wisdom, He knew exactly how to get me to see where my weak point was. His silence wasn’t his absence, but part of His lesson to me. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Embarrassing? Oh yeah! But, I give God such praise for humbling me and shrinking me down in size. Not because He needs me smaller for Him to look bigger, it wasn’t just a slight of hand or an optical illusion. But because only when I realize my stature can I resume the humble posture of praise that He truly deserves. Only when I am smaller will I hold my problems less and become quicker to place them in His fully capable hands. Only when I am smaller I worry less about the future. Only when I am smaller can I fully understand the amazing ever-present, all-knowing, all-powerful presence and power of our Mighty God.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Has God grown small in your eyes? I might encourage you to ask Him to reveal Himself in the fullness of His stature and power, but prepared to be embarrassed. I promise it’s a good thing.</span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-62941925981332899202019-03-16T10:18:00.002-07:002019-03-16T10:19:49.760-07:00A Faithful God- the Extraordinary Testimony of My Otherwise Ordinary Life<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOcV2syMTQ-dB6oT8d5RulJmd9b8vYhOgB8MLOgwd77yG8DkCni0hoAHGkBrSstRZ9cF7526IpjODVY_rO4LV4uuEGfWSPGhoQyDS2DzkSU8r9lgE-W9hfEP6CpHvoQ6H-GHiHEdxRVLM/s1600/God+is+Faithful.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The Backyard Missionary- testimony" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOcV2syMTQ-dB6oT8d5RulJmd9b8vYhOgB8MLOgwd77yG8DkCni0hoAHGkBrSstRZ9cF7526IpjODVY_rO4LV4uuEGfWSPGhoQyDS2DzkSU8r9lgE-W9hfEP6CpHvoQ6H-GHiHEdxRVLM/s640/God+is+Faithful.jpg" title="God is Faithful" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Many people have testimonies filled to the brim of God’s redeeming grace. I LOVE hearing how God moved mountains to reveal himself to the abandoned, the sick, the outcasts, and the broken. In contrast I always felt that my testimony was a little drab compared to the jaw dropping testimonies of some.</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">From a young age my parents placed my tiny hands into the hand of my faithful God. Every crisis, every major event, every decision was brought before God in prayer. As a result He became my “go to” in all circumstance. Not much excitement there in terms of God’s wild redemption. But here’s what has taken me thirty-six years to finally understand...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">There are testimonies of God the Redeemer, God the Healer, God the Provider. While I don’t have one of those, my testimony is one of God the Faithful. I have had 36 years to bear witness to a God who has never failed. A God who has been faithful to his child even when this child wandered or fought against him.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Though the circumstances looked grim, He would always shine through the darkest moments and lead me back to hope. What was meant for evil, God always managed to work for the good (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+50%3A20&version=ESV" target="_blank">Genesis 50:20</a>). And when I shook my fist in anger at the circumstances, he challenged my way of thinking to see clearer His Sovereign hand at work.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">As a teen, when my walk with him was weak, He was my Protector who kept me from wandering too far.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When I lost two babies and was told I may not have children, He was my Provider and gave me three more.</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"> </span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When my husband battled a drug addiction, He was my Strength to stay and fight. </span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When my mom died from terminal cancer, He was the Comforter to my broken heart. </span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When I questioned the church and those inside, He didn’t turn his back on me, He gave me His heart to see hurt as He sees. </span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When I lashed out in frustration at Him over my health, He humbled me to see He is still in charge and trustworthy.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My God has been faithful.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It is hard to wrap my head around it that in spite of my seemingly lack of interest in him at times, though I have failed, He never has. I have walked away in anger, but he didn’t turn on me. I have questioned his motives, but he didn’t flinch. His faithfulness came through every. single. time.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I don’t deserve a God like that. One who holds me and walks beside me and the emotional roller coaster I often ride. But, His ego doesn’t get bruised, His love is a fierce one, and his hands <b>never</b> tire of carrying me. "</span></span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="text Rom-8-38" id="en-ESV-28139" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><i>For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,</i></span><span class="text Rom-8-39" id="en-ESV-28140" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><i><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> </span>nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.</i>" (Romans 8:38-39) </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">I can’t tell you a grand story of being rescued from the streets, or from drugs. But I can tell you </span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">my testimony of how God has faithfully rescued me from myself time and time again. He is my God, the unfailing Faithful One. </span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Whatever you are up against, I am a walking testimony to trust God. There are no obstacles too challenging, no frustrations too deep, and no questions that He won't guide you through to an answer. He is not a God who gives up, nor a God who walks away. </span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-converted-space">To all my fellow rather-ordinary-testimony sisters, this one's for you. Never be ashamed of expressing the extraordinary steadfast faithfulness of our loving Father in your ordinary life.</span></span></span></div>
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photo credit: Edwin Andrade @ UnsplashThe Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-26666930583953594032019-01-29T10:18:00.000-08:002019-01-29T10:18:10.041-08:00The Hidden Blessing of a Long-Term Illness
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Call me a medical anomaly if you will, but for the past few years I have been seeing a vast array of doctors, specialists, naturopaths, and basically anything ending in “ologist”. I’ve tried medications, natural remedies, exercise, and diet changes. Even still, I’ve yet to receive an official diagnosis, though I’ve heard several speculations. While I wait in the line up to see one more “ologist” I have come to realize the hidden blessing of my long-term illness.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">What I do know for certain is that whatever is brewing below the surface, there are plenty of days where my body simply won't cooperate. Last week, driving home caused my wrists to become so inflamed I was unable to hold a knife to make supper by the time I walked in the door. A few days later it had moved on to a new joint once again causing my daily activities to be severely altered.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">If it sounds frustrating, it’s because it is. But, as frustrating at it is, God is faithful in walking beside me, but also in refining me to reshape me into something beautiful (even if outwardly I appear frail).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">I can do <b>all things</b> through him who strengthens me. (Phil 4:13 emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Have you ever wondered what ALL THINGS includes? The better question, as I’m learning, is, “what doesn’t it include?” </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">The answer is: absolutely nothing.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">God has given me a gift in this season, <b>the gift of neediness</b>. I am abundantly needy for his strength, and am reminded of that frequently. I continually find myself in circumstances where I once would’ve thrived in my own strength, but now my body will not cooperate, so I lean on him for strength. Something as simple as opening the stuck lid of a jar required me to pray on the spot, “not my strength but yours. Help!” It opened without effort after I prayed! I really should have started with prayer, but I insisted on grappling the slippery lid, banging the jar on the counter, and doing a weird dance with the jar held between my knees while pulling with my hands on the other end before surrendering and acknowledging my neediness once again.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">God is good like that. Just when we think we have a handle on a situation he humbles us and reminds us it’s not by our strength but by His that we stand. There is NOTHING too small to call on the strength of the Lord for. Our go to at the first moment of a furrowed brow should be to call on God to strengthen us in whatever way we need it. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Maybe you’re like me and it’s physical strength you need, but perhaps for you it’s mental, emotional, or spiritual strength you call on for help. Whatever it is, I’ve learned the gift of neediness is truly a gift worth praising God for. It is in this gift that I am reminded of His goodness, His strength, His mercy, and His compassion. I needn’t worry about my own limitations when I’m walking with such a mighty God.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-converted-space">The gift of my illness has carved out daily moments in my life where frustration has the possibility to take over, but instead I see the God who holds me and strengthens me. I see my desperate need for Him in a life where I would've otherwise missed it. Those moments where the forward motion of my life hits "pause" are a place to sing songs of joy to Him as I lean hard on His everlasting strength.</span></span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-55619067361519033772019-01-07T21:57:00.000-08:002019-01-07T21:57:37.865-08:00When Our Desire to Please God Outruns His Plans
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">We had just turned the lights off in our bedroom to go to sleep when I remembered that I forgotten something downstairs. Thinking my eyes had adjusted to the light, but seriously misjudging just how much they had adjusted, I began inching towards the door. Thinking it was wide open and I had made it to the threshold I confidently picked up the pace to grab what I needed and get back to bed. However, what I did not know and could not see was that the door to our bedroom was only partially open. In one over-confident leap to escape our bedroom I walked square into the edge of the half-opened door. My forehead notified my brain of the collision milliseconds too late as the rest of my body was already following suit into the edge of the door before bouncing back into the abyss of the bedroom. While fumbling for the bedroom light as the twittering birds encircled my head (because chirping cartoon birdies appear when you whack your head!) I could already hear the quiet snickers of my husband from the bed. He didn’t even have the courtesy to pretend he was asleep and save me the humiliation.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">As I switched on the light to survey the damage to my forehead, my husband managed to squeak out an “are you ok?” between his laughter, which had gone from the quiet snicker to a full on howl as he caught sight of me rubbing my head back to health. To this day he still razzes me that only I could manage to run into an open door. I, on the other hand, maintain that it was only open halfway! I just managed to use my head to figure out how to open it fully.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Sometimes trying to hear God’s plan for your life is like that. We can think we know the direction God wants us to go, only to forge ahead in excitement and hit the wall (or door). Part of growing in faith means wisdom enough to know when to stop and wait patiently for clearer direction. Obviously something I struggle with.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">When our desire to please God outruns our desire to be near God we can move too quickly in the wrong direction. Pleasing God comes from the outworking of the fruits that grow in our nearness to him, not in our own decisions to advance our opinion of what should come next. God’s wisdom working in us should teach us that no matter how anxious we feel about needing instant answers and directions we must stop and be willing to wait. God’s timing is perfect, there is no need to rush.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Psalm 127:1</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">In the meantime, save yourself the headache and instead choose to be still and draw near to God. He is well pleased with us even when we aren’t busy “doing” for him. It is simply our relationship with him that takes priority over everything else.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, <b>you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.</b>”<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYAFeaVrWUpDriXNI2WGpUwRPLOjLYn3BbZaPlNNO6G9sg7FGzE7fp5Z_6W5KnQ4gXKRJhuLTosq98GGuwisphqXM4tnHdXE_snYSb1V3-4r1OIPAeZxajwRXMP5jrAq5QfC41xHuVTfE/s1600/tiny+signature.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="506" data-original-width="900" height="111" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYAFeaVrWUpDriXNI2WGpUwRPLOjLYn3BbZaPlNNO6G9sg7FGzE7fp5Z_6W5KnQ4gXKRJhuLTosq98GGuwisphqXM4tnHdXE_snYSb1V3-4r1OIPAeZxajwRXMP5jrAq5QfC41xHuVTfE/s200/tiny+signature.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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Photo credit: Pixabay @ Unsplash.comThe Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-27691410436295602412018-12-10T11:49:00.003-08:002018-12-10T21:48:33.649-08:00Your First Christmas After the Death of a Loved One<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ2i55hnrsY7hosnqjwDZLbBTT4tHQY0Ua3whwr1W8caSSDzLVAOjUdcdE1c-h5-Y7quI2MhD3ITLn9I5VdxLcR5HO9EtZOVeTaYOyPG3zIm_OYi6MPnoj30F4MYM_BcnbiquiCRl0Br4/s1600/coping+after+loss.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Blue Christmas" border="0" data-original-height="1224" data-original-width="1600" height="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ2i55hnrsY7hosnqjwDZLbBTT4tHQY0Ua3whwr1W8caSSDzLVAOjUdcdE1c-h5-Y7quI2MhD3ITLn9I5VdxLcR5HO9EtZOVeTaYOyPG3zIm_OYi6MPnoj30F4MYM_BcnbiquiCRl0Br4/s640/coping+after+loss.jpg" title="Coping at Christmas After a Loss" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">It was early November that Mom took her <a href="https://www.thebackyardmissionary.com/2018/03/oh-death-where-is-your-sting.html" target="_blank">last breath</a>. All to quickly the holiday season crept through the front door that year. Though still feeling the numbness of her absence we began to pick up speed through all our usual festivities. School concerts, church gatherings, family, and more family began to add weight to our already heavy hearts. Christmas night was my breaking point. Walking through the front door my legs gave way below my body and I collapsed on the couch with a weariness that penetrated the depths of my soul. My stomach still queasy from the rich feast I had stuffed down (more food than I had eaten in months), my chest heavy with agonizing grief. It was just.too.much.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The first Christmas without our loved one is perhaps the most agonizing time of the year. A season usually filled with laughter, nearness of family, and joy loses its sparkle under the weight of grief. If I could go back in time I would give myself four pieces of advice, but since time travel is impossible I will share them with you instead in hopes of slightly easing the burden of the grief in your holiday season.</span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">1. Allow yourself time to be sad.</span></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Christmas is truly a season of joy as we remember the birth of our Redeemer, it is certainly a time to pause and celebrate! This year, let your gift to yourself be a gift of grace when the joy doesn't come as easily. Be patient, allowing yourself to be sad. Joy will return in small moments though maybe not through this holiday season, but one day. </span></span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This also goes for the coming years. Grief is a rather odd emotion sneaking up when you least expect it. Be purposeful in taking moments to yourself or with someone you love to be sad and remember the person who has passed. </span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">One day you will smile a genuine smile again. One day you will laugh again. One day you will make it through Christmas and enjoy it once more, but until then be gracious with your heart.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My body was beyond exhausted by the time we made it to Christmas. We had gone from death to funeral to Christmas and both my physical and mental health were deplete. Christmas day I found a quiet space at my grandparent's home, where we were visiting, and excused myself to rest for 30 minutes. Go easy on yourself this year. Slow down the pace and don’t be afraid to say “no” to events and invites. You will be tired as you work to process your emotions and down time will be essential. Give yourself scheduled breaks to be able to rest even if you don’t sleep.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">3. Find a way to remember your loved one</span></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">On the top of our tree we place an angel that my mom had given to me just before she got sick. Every year our angel finds her place atop our tree and everyone in our home knows the angel is our precious reminder of Mom/ Grammy. You could put out a photo or ornament, light a candle, recite their favourite Bible passage, play their favourite song, or leave an extra place setting at your table. Whatever it is, do something to remember them and remind you of the cherished memories you still carry even though they are gone.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> It is in those sweet memories that you will find the healing balm for your wounded heart.</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">4. Know that how you feel won’t last forever</span></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Christmas is no longer what it once was. Every now and then I still find myself grieving over what use to be, but we have found a new normal. This is true whenever there are monumental changes in our lives be it a death, a move, divorce, a new baby, or anything that brings about newness good or bad. Our traditions have changed a little to adapt. Our new traditions are growing sweeter again as the holidays no longer sting like they once did. It is hard my sweet reader but the crushing pangs of grief will lift, don’t take my word for it, here’s what God has to say to you:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit</i>. (Psalm 34:18)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.</i> (Matthew 5:4)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven…a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance…</i> (Ecclesiastes<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>3:1,4)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest</i>. (Matthew 11:28)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Take heart. Know that God is near you, comforting you, and strengthening you as you rest.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Love,</span></span><br />
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photo credits: Annie Spratt @ UnsplashThe Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-90482567341591819932018-12-03T23:17:00.000-08:002018-12-10T10:39:25.995-08:002 Truths to Hang Tightly to When Riding an Emotional Rollercoaster<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBKWbhus-mRMsi_pPJAcNh6HOqOq-3n4_MdDruZ1iyBxAHqZuXyZf2loP-1OAnFb_TSWSjz5_myW0nzo7mcX1ypfgKcZlcwl7NKJfXfQrUlSoXB7g5Zqp0_ZeRur6nvWyslPcdVkXMtgM/s1600/Christians+and+Feelings.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="2 things our feelings cannot do" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBKWbhus-mRMsi_pPJAcNh6HOqOq-3n4_MdDruZ1iyBxAHqZuXyZf2loP-1OAnFb_TSWSjz5_myW0nzo7mcX1ypfgKcZlcwl7NKJfXfQrUlSoXB7g5Zqp0_ZeRur6nvWyslPcdVkXMtgM/s640/Christians+and+Feelings.jpg" title="Navigating Through Feelings as Christians" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Emotions are odd things. They can swell up unexpectedly whether the moment calls for them or not, or they can be oddly absent when we are expected to have a response. Often we can even find ourselves depending on our emotions to be the driving force behind decision making. </span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Emotions are subjective, not objective. They are dependant on the person experiencing them, and the entirety of who they are and where they’ve been is what brings about an emotional response. Emotions are not to be shrugged off but dealt with, however, there are two objective truths as Christians we must cling tightly to as we wade through the sea of emotions in our lives.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">1. Our emotions cannot separate us from God.</span></b></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">There is a new kind of legalism taking over the church. This legalism implies that we must be optimistic at all times or else our faith is in jeopardy. We smile big to prove we possess Abraham like faith never letting on what’s brewing below the surface for fear others may perceive in us a weakness of faith.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">After Jesus was resurrected, but prior to his ascension he made several appearances. One, in particular, is my favourite. Two men are walking home from Jerusalem to Emmaus when Jesus shows up and starts walking alongside them. God makes the two men blind in their understanding of who Jesus is and they all begin to talk.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>And he </i>(Jesus)<i> said to them, “What is this conversation that you are holding with each other as you walk?” And they stood still, </i><b><i>Iooking sad</i></b><i>.</i><b><i>”</i> </b>(Luke 24:17, parentheses mine, emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">They proceed to tell Jesus in all their sadness what they had just witnessed during his crucifixion in Jerusalem. His death still fresh and lingering in their thoughts brought them to a devastating conclusion:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>“But we </i><b><i>had hoped</i></b><i> that he was the one to redeem Israel. Yes, and besides all this, it is now the third day since these things happened.”</i> (Luke 24:21)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">They “had hoped” past tense.<b> </b>Their hope was gone and they were sad, and yet walking alongside them was Jesus.<b> In all their despair, the one who gives comfort was there all along! </b>He walked with them talking as he went. At their home they invited Jesus in where he broke bread and blessed it at which point God revealed for the first time who their company really was.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When we are blue, bitter, discouraged, frustrated we need to remember our emotions cannot separate us from God. In fact, as the two men found out, in their sadness and longing for a Redeemer he was closer than they recognized. What is important to note is that it is sin that causes separation from God not emotions, though emotions can lead us to sin if not kept in check. </span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The two men experienced one last emotion that came with a very physical response.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i>They said to each other, “Did not our </i><b><i>hearts burn</i></b><i> within us while he talked to us on the road, </i><b><i>while he opened to us the Scriptures</i></b><i>?” </i>(Luke 24:32 emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">God’s word, like Jesus’ presence to the men, is where we find the balm for our aching souls. We pour out our hearts like the Psalms of lament and allow God to comfort, redeem, correct our thinking when we’ve strayed, and walk beside us in all our emotions knowing that He already knows how we feel. In our honesty and surrender He can move in to begin to restore. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">2. Our emotions cannot not bind us to God.</span></b></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Many of us have felt the euphoric rush of a good worship song, and no doubt the Holy Spirit can speak to us as we offer up our songs of praise and worship to God! It is an extraordinary feeling to be surrounded by God's presence! But long after the band's last song, when we go home to our ordinary lives, our prayers sometimes seem to fall flat. Sometimes we even experience extended seasons where the fullness of God’s presence seems absent in our lives. In these seasons we need to remember it is not our emotions that bond us to God, but the redeeming blood of our Saviour that justifies our eternal bond.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When Jesus casts out Legion (found in Matthew 8 and Mark 5) even the demons had an emotional response to his presence.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Seeing Jesus from a distance, he ran up and <b>bowed down</b> before Him; and <b>shouting</b> with a loud voice, he said, “What business do we have with each other, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I <b>implore</b> You by God, <b>do not torment me</b>!” For He had been saying to him, “Come out of the man, you unclean spirit!” And He was asking him, “What is your name?” And he said to Him, “My name is Legion; for we are many.” And <b>he began to implore Him</b> earnestly not to send them out of the country. (Mark 5:6-10 emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">These demons very clearly had an emotional response. We know that demons believe in God and shudder (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=James+2%3A19&version=ESV" target="_blank">James 2:19)</a>. They can have wildly emotional responses around God yet we know they are not saved. Because of this we can know that whether it was the shudder at the name of God or tears shed while speaking to him in prayer it is still not an indication that we are saved and bonded to Christ. We do not need to have an emotional response each and every time as much as we long to sense God's presence.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When we hang onto our moments of tearful euphoria as our hope for salvation, we ignore God’s other gift of logic and our minds. Though logic does not carry the warmth of an emotional experience, it is our anchor in seasons of drought. We can <i>know</i> that God is real because his word tells us so. We can <i>know</i> we are saved because his word also tells us without error that those who confess that Jesus is Lord, that he died for our sins, and who repent are adopted sons and daughters in God’s family. God is still present and working in our lives even we don't feel it. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">When our prayer life feels stagnant and dull we can certainly ask God’s Spirit to refresh our prayer lives. However, should we find ourselves in a quiet season of life, we can know in our mind, and hold tight to our faith that God is still there, and our salvation still stands, emotions notwithstanding. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">So take a deep breath. Thank God for giving us emotions as a way to express ourselves, but don’t cling so tightly to how you feel allowing your emotions to be your driving force. Know that your emotions cannot keep you from nor bind you to God. They will ebb and flow like they always do. Instead, hold fast to the word of God that provides us comfort and correction to soothe our aches and promises to anchor our thoughts knowing he is still walking alongside us.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-88853909014534988142018-08-19T22:51:00.000-07:002018-08-19T22:51:00.334-07:002 Reasons Why God Causes Separation Between Believers
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">There was a time, not so long ago, that I can remember pulling into our church’s parking lot Sunday morning and my stomach would instantly begin to churn. My husband and I would walk in, hear nothing, and leave empty, if not a little angry. The church was in the middle of a split and we were too close to those at the epicentre to not feel the impact of the rift. Our friends were pitted against each other and the oppressive hit of harsh words was shattering their hearts and long term bonds. From the sidelines our own hearts were broken as we witnessed the slow train-wreck in front of us. Eventually, Sunday mornings were too heavy to desire to walk through the front door. We left.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">For the longest time I wondered where God’s hand had been. This was HIS house! Why was he not working to keep his body of believers together? After some time away, and A LOT of digging into God’s word, I can finally look back and see God’s hand actually was on the circumstances. Along the way, I have found at least two reasons why God allows these events to unfold, painful as they may be.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">1. God separates to protect the humble, and humble the proud</span></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">During the time of the Judges, “<i>Everyone did what was right in his own eyes.</i>” (Judges 21:25b) There were twelve tribes in Israel, and one tribe takes the stage in this example. Judges 19 tells a gruesome story of a Levite’s concubine being brutally raped, beaten, and left to die by men from the tribe of Benjamin. In retaliation the other tribes of Israel go to battle against the Benjamites. These tribes seem to be losing the battle against the ferocious Benjamin tribe until they stop to fast, pray, and offer sacrifices to the Lord. When their hearts are made right, God hands the Benjamites over the tribes and they are defeated. Out of 25,000 men in the tribe of Benjamin, only 600 manage to escape to the hills (Judges 20). If we look one more chapter over we see a key verse:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><i>And the people had compassion on Benjamin because <b>the Lord had made a breach</b> in the tribes of Israel.</i> (Judges 21:15 emphasis mine)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">The word breach here means a gap. By the hand of God division was made among the body of his holy nation. In this case, God separated the humbled tribes who had made their hearts right with God, from the proud tribe who had chosen to live how they felt was right in their own eyes.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><i>Then all the people of Israel, the whole army, went up and came to Bethel and wept. They sat there before the Lord and fasted that day until evening, and offered burnt offerings and peace offerings before the Lord. And the people of Israel inquired of the Lord (for the ark of the covenant of God was there in those days, and Phinehas the son of Eleazar, son of Aaron, ministered before it in those days), saying, “Shall we go out once more to battle against our brothers, the people of Benjamin, or shall we cease?” And the Lord said, “Go up, for tomorrow I will give them into your hand.”</i> (Judges 20:26-28)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">God was protecting those who had chosen to be obedient to his commands, from those who were tarnishing his Holy Nation. There are times when God steps in to offer protection and it looks like a painful division. He is protecting those sheep who know his voice and desire to follow it. But, as the Good Shepherd, he is removing the wolves from the pack as he providentially works to maintain his body of believers.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Should we find ourselves in this situation, let us first take the position of a humble bended knee as we seek Christ. May we pause long enough to hold out our hurt and anger to God and ask if it was us who made the offence. Is it possible we have wandered too far out of God’s earshot to know His commands? Has our pride blinded our judgements? If so, we repent, and ask God for forgiveness. If it was not us, then we seek God and <i>offer</i> forgiveness to those who have hurt us.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">There is hope in this circumstance regardless of which group you belong in. God did not completely destroy this tribe. His temporary breech in the tribes was for the purpose to humble the proud tribe who did what was right their eyes. Saul, a Benjamite, mentions this to Samuel when he says, "Am I not a Benjaminite, from the least of the tribes of Israel? And is not my clan the humblest of all the clans of the tribe of Benjamin?" (1 Sam 9:21) God used the separation to protect the humble from those who hurt them, but also to teach the proud who has true authority.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">In the case of this cause of separation, we pray for pure hearts in ourselves, making sure our own pride is not the reason for a separation; and for the hearts of those who have already strayed.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">2. God separates for the multiplication of His Kingdom</span></span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><i><span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>And after some days Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us return and visit the brothers in every city where we proclaimed the word of the Lord, and see how they are.” Now Barnabas wanted to take with them John called Mark. But Paul thought best not to take with them one who had withdrawn from them in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work. And there arose a sharp disagreement, so that they separated from each other. Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and departed, having been commended by the brothers to the grace of the Lord. And he went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches. </i>(Acts 15:36-41)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">At first glance it appears as though two good friends have an argument and decide to part ways. If we dig in deeper to what happened we can see a different side to this split.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">Back in the day Paul (then Saul) was struck down and corrected by God. He is told to stop persecuting Christians and become a preacher to the Gentiles. When Paul lands in Jerusalem none of the disciples are comfortable letting this former murderer of Christians into their circle, except for Barnabas (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts+9&version=ESV" target="_blank">Acts 9</a>). So Barnabas, whose name means encourager (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts+4%3A36&version=ESV" target="_blank">Act 4:36</a>), becomes an encourager and exhorter to Paul. He spurs Paul on in his calling, and the two become travel companions as they preach the gospel message.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">For a time, a young man named Mark joins them along the journey. Mark departs the team (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts+13%3A13&version=NIV" target="_blank">Acts 13:13</a>), leaving a bad taste in Paul’s mouth. Barnabas, being an encourager by nature, wants to bring Mark alongside him once again (as Barnabas once did with Paul), but Paul is adamant Mark not join in. They are about to retrace their steps back to the cities they came from and Paul does not want the tagalong who left them once already to be brought with them. Thus, the two men part ways via a sharp disagreement. What we do see is that Paul takes Silas and goes back to Syria and Cilicia, while Barnabas takes Mark and goes back to Cyprus.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">We learn later in Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians that he speaks lovingly of his friend Barnabas (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+cor+9%3A6&version=NIV" target="_blank">1 Cor. 9:6</a>). It becomes clear that the two eventually reconcile, or at least become settled again in their hearts over how they feel about each other. Paul also later tells Timothy, “<i>Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry.</i>” (2 Tim 4:11)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">The unfolding of this disagreement reveals the guiding of God’s hand. God built Paul up through circumstances in Paul’s life to be a man who would unashamedly correct wrong behaviour within the churches. Paul visits those churches he and Barnabas planted as he retraces his steps and speaks boldly over bodies of believers. Barnabas, also revisits churches, thus splitting the load with Paul. but Barnabas does it by being the man God built him up to be, the encourager. He visits less hostile churches and gives Mark the second chance he needs to grow in his own ministry, thus making Mark an invaluable tool later on.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">God used the personal convictions of these two men to cause a division. No doubt, hearts were hurt as they sorted through who would go where. Long term we can see God split apart two to multiply many. His sovereign hand was at work guiding these two causing them to move apart so others could be taught, trained, corrected, and raised up stronger.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">This was the case in what my husband and I were witnessing. A sharp contrast in convictions led to a parting of ways. Did it hurt? Absolutely! But, as years have gone by I can see both parties flourishing and are exactly where God needed them to be. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;">If your heart is heavy-burdened over a split between yourself and a godly friend, or a separation in your church, take heart. God’s guiding hand is indeed at work.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><i>And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.</i> (Rom 8:28)</span></span></div>
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photo credit: Kamboompics.com@ PexelsThe Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-45215861220203875952018-08-09T21:20:00.002-07:002018-08-15T20:48:33.454-07:00For The Late Night Worrier: The Theology of Sleep <style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLBlHxBesQQkLo0k0OkLnsGE6T-K_NN9Hnm54qxCQhLCy9VJo7GOhqcNmTMgsCNsB9Z-yV6H_koI77HkpQCkKm7AUpm4p8nkGRhZJee6YI7ZB9eJDeGtmQjNANi7G-aYPGN13LyLgbpxE/s1600/annie-spratt-548180-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1225" data-original-width="1600" height="490" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLBlHxBesQQkLo0k0OkLnsGE6T-K_NN9Hnm54qxCQhLCy9VJo7GOhqcNmTMgsCNsB9Z-yV6H_koI77HkpQCkKm7AUpm4p8nkGRhZJee6YI7ZB9eJDeGtmQjNANi7G-aYPGN13LyLgbpxE/s640/annie-spratt-548180-unsplash.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">According to <a href="https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/051116/dq051116a-eng.htm"><span class="s2">Statistics Canada</span></a> there are approximately 3.3 million Canadians who battle insomnia. I am one of them. There have been times when my insomnia was brought about by chemical deficiency, but if I’m really being honest, I would say the majority of my sleeping problems are caused by stress. I am a Midnight Worrier. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">There is something about that moment when my head hits the pillow that causes my brain to wake up. I begin to unravel the day, and yesterday, and tomorrow, and 10 years ago, and 10 years into the future. Like a hamster in a squeaky wheel, my mind begins to race. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">What is it that keeps me going all. night. long? Like lingering question marks when I wanted a period, they are the unsolved problems of the hour/day/week. The questions I either could not solve, or did not have time to solve. And the deeper into the dark of night I go, the larger the question marks become, dancing around my head.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">And then, with the quiet nudging of the Holy Spirit, I hear, “<i>he makes me lie down in green pastures.</i>” (Ps 23:1b) He is calling me to sleep. God knows. He knows the answers to my unknowns, because He is the all-knowing. My circumstances are real. My trials are real. My conflicts are real. But, they are not mine to hold, not for the 8 hours I ought be sleeping for, nor for the 16 hours that follow. He did not call me into midnight turmoil, he called me to the quietness of his side. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><i>“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” </i>(Matt 11:28)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><i>In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat-- for he grants sleep to those he loves. </i>(Ps 127:2)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">When God made us he purposefully did not make us to be able to function without sleep. He knew we would need sleep because he made us to need it. It was not an arbitrary purpose either, he had a plan right from day one. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">The very first day of creation, God made light and dark, and separated the two. He began by making rhythm and pattern, not for his benefit, but for ours. He knew once humans were made we would need the peace of the darkness of night to reset. A time set aside each day where we shut down and shut off and be human, not gods.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><i>“God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day</i>.” (Gen 1:5)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">He continued until day 7 when God himself rests. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">“<i>Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.” </i>(Gen 2:3)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">He did not do this because HE needed rest, but one of the many implications of this is that God again set a pattern for us to follow. If God took time to stop creating, and we are not above God, then we certainly need to have moments to stop “doing”, and that includes quieting our obnoxiously loud thoughts. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">Laying down and resting is an act of submission that we are not miniature gods. Sleep requires us to acknowledge that whatever weighty thoughts or activities we are trying to solve are not ours to carry. We are the sheep, he is the Shepherd. “<i>He will not let your foot slip-- he who watches over you will not slumber.</i>” (Ps 121:3) He holds your circumstances, your deadlines, your relationships, your kids, your marriage, your health, and your future 24 hours a day 7 days a week. All of it is firmly in his hands. In full surrender that the faithful God of yesterday, today, and tomorrow is firmly in control we can lay down in green pastures and rest. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">It may feel like we are finishing with lingering question marks, but know that God, who writes your story, places the finality of periods where he sees fit. He knows perfectly what is to come, and when the sun goes down, it is time for you to rest while He continues to unfold his plans. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">Tonight, as you go to lay down, imagine for a moment that your bed is the mighty hands of God. Fall into them and know that, “He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day”. (Ps 91:4-5)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">photo credit: Annie Spratt @ Unsplash</span></div>
The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-62410831585208355212018-07-11T22:38:00.000-07:002018-08-15T20:48:59.605-07:00How Much Faith do I Need to be Healed?<style type="text/css">
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">“If he just had a little more faith I know he would be healed!”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">She had great concern for her friend and his current health crisis, and she wasn’t the first one to lament the seemingly lack of faith in a loved one.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">“How much faith does one need to be healed?”, I asked. Her puzzled look told me she had not thought about that yet. So I went on, and it sounded something like this...</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;"><span class="s2">The Bible tells us that “</span><span class="s1"><i>if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move.</i>” (Matthew 17:20b) Surely if such a minuscule amount of faith can move mountains it would be more than enough for anyone to be healed.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">But, just how much faith is a mustard seed faith?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">Mustard seed faith is the tiniest seed of a new found faith in God. It is the first utterance of a declaration that God is real and Jesus is your personal Saviour. It is the admittance that you believe in and belong to God’s family.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">Her friend indeed was a child of God and had been for many years. We established he certainly had at least mustard seed-sized faith even if he had never grown in faith since he first prayed for God to be part of his life.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">The problem with this notion that if we just had more faith all things would work out is that it is a self-defeating statement. It puts pressure on ourselves to rummage up enough faith to make things happen, and when they don’t we feel we have failed God. So we try other routes: more prayers, more good deeds, more tithing, more reading our Bibles...all great things...but when the desired outcome does not come we grow deeply discouraged. And not that moody-blue "I'm-having-a-bad-day" type of discouragement. We are talking about deep dissatisfaction to the core of our souls. We want to give up and question if God is even listening, or moreso, if he even exists. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">I had my friend open to the book of Job and read the very first verse:<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;"><i>In the land of Uz there lived a man whose name was Job. This man was </i><b><i>blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil</i></b><i>. </i>(Job 1:1 emphasis my own)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">Blameless, upright, God-fearing, and he turned away from evil. This is a man of exemplary faith!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>We could most certainly say that Job at least had faith the size of a mustard seed. Oddly enough, it did not keep Job in good health. In fact, this wealthy land owner was not only struck down in his own health, but experienced the death of his children, and the loss of his livelihood. It left Job wondering "why me?". A question we too often face when confronted with the painfully unexpected trials of life that seem to come wave upon wave.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">While I can’t answer why, I do know this...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">The only faith you need to have is enough faith to trust God has a plan even when the mountain does not move. Sometimes He needs us to faithfully start climbing instead of asking him to flatten the steep incline in front of us. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: medium;">Do not believe for one second that your future health and healing depend on you and your ability to muster up faith. You simply do not hold that kind of power. The hands that set the earth on its foundation are holding you as you go along no matter how grim it may appear in this moment. Maybe you will be healed, maybe not. The guarantee we long for does not exist this side of Heaven anyway. Our guarantee is the promise of eternal life through Jesus. With eyes fixed on eternity it makes any climb worth it.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span><br />
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-39905737866173808822018-06-10T11:24:00.001-07:002018-06-10T11:32:11.227-07:00Lessons from the Highway<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Not every moment is going to be easy, even when we walk it with God. There are no promises that everyday will be a smooth ride! Sometimes it's all to easy to become wrapped up in the all encompassing mess that is in front of us. Last week, while coming home from a road trip, I found myself being drawn into the tarred-up broken lines on the road. Below is a video to show you the metaphor I saw while driving that helps us to see above the broken road. </div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qCYHmNFz01k/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/qCYHmNFz01k?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe></div>
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"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."</div>
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~ Jesus (Matthew 11:28)</div>
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Love,</div>
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Sarah</div>
<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-74862557513709096262018-05-11T09:58:00.002-07:002018-06-30T22:34:09.312-07:00A Letter From Mom (Even Though I am no Longer With You)<style type="text/css">
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><i>I remember the first Mother's Day after my mom has passed. There was an entire holiday I felt I could not participate in anymore, an entire wall at Hallmark was no longer for me. Never again would I find her the perfect card to describe how I felt. This letter is part of a series of letters I have called "Dear Daughter". They are written to my daughters, and I have been sharing them with you from time to time. This one is written for them to read once I am gone, but actually I wrote it partly for myself from my own mom. I hope it helps your aching heart as you grieve a mom who isn't there this Mother's Day weekend.</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Dear Daughter,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">What I want you to know is that my love for you has no end.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">From the moment I knew you were forming inside me I loved you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I had a secret the world couldn’t see.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I treasured those moments when I carried you </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">hidden away</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"> from harshness of this world.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">It was just you and I.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">The day I finally got to hold you was like no day ever before.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I had never seen a “you” before!</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I saw your eyes and you looked at me.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Your tiny lips were pursed just right;</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I couldn’t help but to kiss them.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I had plans and dreams with you;</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Some of those plans worked out, other did not.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">It wasn’t always easy though,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">We haven’t always seen eye to eye;</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">But nothing will ever change how much I love you and treasure you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Time passes, dear daughter, </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">and as you know,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I will not always be able to walk beside you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I will not always be close by, or even a phone call away.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">You may not see me anymore,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">But you need to know...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Just because you cannot see me does not mean I have forgotten you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">From the quiet moments of us the first night I brought you home,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">To the moments leading up to my last breath,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Every one of those is embedded deeply into my memory bank,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">a bank rich in thoughts of you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Rest assured darling, you are still on my mind.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">But there’s more you still need to know...</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">However we left each other, whatever words were spoken,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">If it was needed,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I have forgiven you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">You are my daughter and I your mother,<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">That is bond that always offers forgiveness.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Rest peacefully knowing I do not carry that hurt with me anymore.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I love you.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Until we meet again,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Love you always and forever,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Mom.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">photo credit:<a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/GkC4ZrByC3I" target="_blank"> <span style="color: #111111; font-family: , , "san francisco" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "ubuntu" , "roboto" , "noto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: whitesmoke; box-sizing: border-box; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out; white-space: nowrap;">Nikola Radojcic</span></span></a> @ Unsplash </span></div>
<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-86453456983670835122018-05-02T21:01:00.001-07:002019-12-30T22:07:37.193-08:00How to Get Past Your Fears of Praying Out Loud<style type="text/css">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">"I'm too afraid to pray out loud."</span></h3>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">It’s a phrase I have heard time and time again from countless women. It usually comes on the heels of the suggestion that we are to gather together and pray. I know this fear because I once felt this way too.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">The moment prayer would begin I would start to rehearse the prayer in my mind. I would think up words to say and arrange them to sound “godly” or “spiritual”. Then, in a moment of quiet, I would recite my words out loud and hope to hear a few resounding “amens” from others as reassurance that I had said something worthwhile.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">The whole event was rather stressful and left me with anything but peace and a longing for the quiet of my home and my private prayers. As I grew in faith I came to realize much of what I was fearful of was silly preconceived notions of what prayer ought to be. As I picked through them I gained confidence in public prayer. Here are a few of those notions to help you if you too are one of those people who dread public prayers.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><b>1. Our prayers must sound eloquent and wise.</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><b>False</b>. There will be some who pray with words that would make any english university professor applaud. I’m guessing that those who pray like that also speak like that. You know how my prayers sound? In this phase of life they are about as grandiose as my three word sentences to my toddler. Simple, clear, concise, but not dragging and that’s ok. <b>God doesn’t need eloquently worded prayers, he needs genuine hearts.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">Jesus new we would be tempted to pray in ways that would contradict a genuine heart for God in prayer:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><i>And when you pray, </i><b><i>do not keep on babbling </i></b><i>like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. (Matthew 6:7 emphasis mine)</i></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><i>"But the tax collector stood at a distance. </i><b><i>He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast</i></b><i> and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.' (Luke 18:13 emphasis mine)</i></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">We don’t pray to impress the others in the room, we pray to draw near to God. He knows who you are, and he wants YOUR prayers in the way YOU pray them, not in the way others pray them. Don’t try to sound lofty, just speak as you normally do. After all, prayer is just a fancy word for talking to and listening to God. It's still just a conversation.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">2. We need to pray exactly what others are praying for.</span></b></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><b>False. </b>“We need to pray for our nation right now,” says the first person. It is a noble request worthy of prayer, so we begin to pray for our nation. But suddenly, God begins to stir your heart towards something else. Perhaps you really, REALLY feel like you need to pray for your pastor. Or perhaps you really, REALLY feel like you just want to bust out a worship song and praise God. Ok, maybe I’ve made you uncomfortable with that last one, but the point is this: God’s will is what we are seeking. As we seek him, he will naturally stir our hearts towards his desire. We cannot see the full picture, so while the focus may begin with a prompting to pray for our nation, maybe, just maaaaaybe God knows your pastor will need support to stand in the nation. Or maybe, just maaaaaybe God knows of a place that needs more prayer or praise, and the nation, in that moment, isn’t it.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">Don't worry about speaking from somewhere out of left field. If that's what God has placed in your hear speak it out! He know how it fits into the prayer even if you, or others can't make sense of it.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">3. I don’t need prayers for myself.</span></b></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;"><b>False.</b> Sometimes when we gather, the request is to prayer for each other. You know what’s really scary? Admitting you need prayer from others. It means you have to admit that you are struggling somewhere. It’s easy when someone says, "can I pray for you?" I’ve yet to meet someone who will turn that down. It’s different to volunteer your request to be prayed for. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">I have felt that fear, and can I just say that the fear of speaking up is ALWAYS short lived. At the end of the day, most people who are committed to the Lord know that we cannot walk this crazy world on our own. We are here for each other, and sometimes that means we are here to hold each other in prayer and petition.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">When we stop buying into these false notions the fear of praying publicly will diminish. God will slowly give you more confidence as you go. If you’ve never prayed in public, try a sentence next time. Just one. That’s ok. Your obedient heart to serve God in prayer will not go unnoticed by Him. He will strengthen you as go bravely.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: medium;">Love,</span></span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-82265723715377946922018-04-29T21:58:00.001-07:002019-12-30T22:02:13.257-08:00How to Pray Like Jesus<style type="text/css">
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-size: small;">Imagine for a minute the lifestyle of an olympic athlete. Their athletic lifestyle overlaps in many of their daily activities from what they eat, to what they wear, to how they manage their schedule.</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">What if we looked at prayer not as a one shot daily duty like brushing your teeth, but using the same lens of an athlete. What if we integrate and intertwine prayer into every element of our day? By doing this you would be disciplining yourself in a prayer lifestyle.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Paul puts it this way in 1 Corinithians 9:24-27 (emphasis in bold is my own):</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.</i><b><i> Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training</i></b><i>. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.</i><b><i> </i></b><i>Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air.</i><b><i> </i></b><i>No, </i><b><i>I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave</i></b><i> so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Prayer as a lifestyle is one that, like every other lifestyle, takes discipline.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Whether or not we are aware of it or not, marriage is also a lifestyle. It is a lifestyle that is intertwined in our day as we attempt to keep open communication with our spouse. Maybe it’s a phone call at work to say hi, or making a point to have a meal together, or even going on frequent date nights.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">What if we treated the lifestyle of marriage like we do the daily duty of brushing our teeth? We would get up, spend 60 seconds saying hi, then never have another conversation until the end of the day. Our final 60 second conversation might look like this:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“How was your day?”<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“Good.”<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“And yours?”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“Well...there was this problem in the office today that I struggled with.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“That’s nice. Have a good sleep.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">“You too.”</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Zzzzz.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Not exactly the way to keep your marriage working. Yet, we do this in our relationship with God all the time when we treat prayer like a duty that needs to be squeezed in at some point in the day.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Prayer is just a fancy word for being in communication with God. If He is to be of even higher priority than any other relationships we have, should He not take the majority of our time as well? For many of us, this where that discipline comes into play as we seek to change habits to train ourselves to make speaking and listening to God (AKA-prayer) a lifestyle.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Jesus was way ahead of us on our struggles with how to keep open lines of communication with God, so he gave us the Lord’s Prayer. Most of us know it as that thing we mutter at funerals, or perhaps first thing in the morning, or just before bed as a prayer. But have you ever stopped to make sense of what Jesus was showing us?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">The Lord’s Prayer can certainly be read as a stand alone prayer, but more importantly it is a <b>guideline</b> for our prayers so we don’t draw a blank and treat prayer as a daily task amongst the other varying tasks. Listen to it in full, but from the Message translation to see if you can catch it:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">Our Father in heaven,</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">Do what’s best—</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;"> as above, so below.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">Keep us alive with three square meals.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">Keep us forgiven with you and forgiving others.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">Keep us safe from ourselves and the Devil.</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">You’re in charge!</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">You can do anything you want!</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">You’re ablaze in beauty!</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;"> Yes. Yes. Yes.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">(Matthew 9-13 The Message)</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">If we take the version we are more familiar with and extract it in sections the guideline Jesus gave us looks like the following:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>Our Father in heaven, Hallowed be Your name.</b></span></span><br />
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">We begin with praise! How easy to incorporate praise throughout our day, especially when we make a point to recognize all the great elements of God’s goodness around us. From the beauty of the morning sunrise, to the fragrance of a fresh rainfall, to the happiness of our kids, or a phone call when we need it. His magnificent hand is on it all!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>Your kingdom come. Your will be done; on earth as it is in heaven.</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">After praise, we begin with the “listening to God” portion of prayer. Before we speak, we listen. This is a laying down of our own wills and desires and allowing God to interrupt our days. Sometimes, He calls on us to intercede and places a person, place, or moment deeply in our heart to prayer for. This is when we join with him in prayers that He needs (more on this coming soon in a future post). Sometimes, it is that God will place a person in our lives, even if just for a small moment in our day, that He needs to speak life into.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Note that this one comes before we ask daily provisions. Before we pull out own checklist of needs we wait on God’s interruptions to bombard our hearts and stir us to see as He sees. It is an acknowledgement that His will comes before our will, and as such we lay down our lives to “seek first the kingdom of God.” (Matt 6:33)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Once we lay aside our own will, we are still allowed to come to the throne with our daily requests. In fact, God is our Father, he wants us to come to him with our requests.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;"><b><i>“</i></b><i>do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” (Phil 4:6)</i></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Daily we are offering forgiveness to those around us. From the person who cuts us off in traffic, to an offending spouse who spoke cruelly, to the past hurts that bubble up.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">But more importantly, we need to be asking for forgiveness from our Heavenly Father. If you have accepted Jesus died for your sins, you no longer stand condemned, but this does not mean you no longer sin. What it does mean is a heartfelt apology to God washes the smudges of sin once again and then you move on free of guilt.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">There are temptations in every aspect of daily living, but God promises to always offer a way out, or an escape hatch when the temptation is too strong.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-size: small;">No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (1 Cor 10:13)</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Even more, this passage is a call to battle. We are constantly bombarded with pressure from the enemy who always seeking to set up camp in our thoughts. Here we acknowledge we are children of God, and we can call on His name when we need strength. “Holy Spirit come quick,” is often being uttered in my moments of weakness.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Once again, we find praise. Jesus knows that through praise and worship we set our gaze fully on God. As my favourite hymn says:</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Turn your eyes upon Jesus,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Look full in His wonderful face,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">In the light of His glory and grace.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">(Helen H. Lemmel)</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">As we train ourselves to use this model of prayer, we can see how we can intertwine these moments into our daily living and be disciplined the prayer lifestyle. We praise, we listen, we petition, we apologize, we wage war, and we find rest in the praise and worship of a good God at the end of it all. Whether you are sitting in prayer for hours (somedays you might!), or intertwining short effective prayers throughout the day, the goal is to always be communication with our Abba. Listening, speaking, and being in his presence. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">If you wish to read deeper on using the Lord’s Prayer as a prayer guideline for more effective prayers, you can check out the book <a href="https://www.prayershop.org/Power-Praying-p/bst-chd-bk-001.htm" target="_blank">Power Praying</a> by <a href="https://www.prayershop.org/Power-Praying-p/bst-chd-bk-001.htm" target="_blank">David Chotka</a>. Much of what is included in the breakdown of the Lord's Prayer was taught in practice to me by this wonderful pastor/ teacher. </span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Love,</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: small;">Sarah</span></span></div>
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-71452050368909673482018-03-31T22:36:00.000-07:002018-04-01T00:29:06.298-07:00Oh Death, Where is your Sting?<style type="text/css">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgep1u5JdJh72h2xRMxicTRiYo6SDP9AnhiIB0mCV8eqP-NR_Wof1kXCnNpHODCKDkGm9YdJbwGBOOJzyTiCooD_ZbsS0yyUwWFEw1AURbuOT1eUka5TNgzaW7WiAAVIz-AMH1q4hnVsXM/s1600/ohdeath.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgep1u5JdJh72h2xRMxicTRiYo6SDP9AnhiIB0mCV8eqP-NR_Wof1kXCnNpHODCKDkGm9YdJbwGBOOJzyTiCooD_ZbsS0yyUwWFEw1AURbuOT1eUka5TNgzaW7WiAAVIz-AMH1q4hnVsXM/s640/ohdeath.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">I remember that morning well. We had just barely slept for a few brief hours before we were called back to see her. We were exhausted as we walked down the hospital corridors to her room. I took a deep breath, opened the door and went in...alone.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">The morning sunlight danced beautifully around her room. It was quiet and soothing. I walked cautiously to the side of her bed unsure if I was ready to see her. Just two short hours before, my mom had taken her last breath. Her journey with us ended...or so it felt at the time.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Death was not new to me. In fact, death had become so commonplace in my life that I surprised myself by my reaction to this particular one. She wasn’t even my first “major” death as they call it (whoever "they" are). But this one took me on a journey.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Where exactly had she gone? She clearly wasn’t with me in the room anymore, only her vacant, warm shell remained. She still smelled like mom, still felt like mom I noted as I buried my face in her neck inhaling deeply. I noted the freckle on her jawline as I mentally tried to absorb every detail of her so as not to forget later. It was the same freckle I fell asleep looking at as she used to rock me when I was young.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">But where was mom?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">My Christian upbringing told me that she was in Heaven. I never once doubted that.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Everyone kept saying, “She’s with the Lord now.” I believed that too.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">“She’s gone home,” said another. Yup. Got it.</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">But where was home?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Oh Heaven, how my human brain has grappled with who you are! But as time went on, a few truths began to sink in:<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span></div>
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<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><b>1. </b></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Heaven is not a floating </b><b>destination</b><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> in the clouds.</b><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> It is real. It is concrete. Mom’s feet were not floating around somewhere. They were walking on the very real soil of Heaven. Although I’ve never been to Australia, I know it is real and people are doing things similar to where I live. Heaven is no different, although it is most perfect and free from sin, it is still as real as the countries of earth.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><b>2. </b></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Heaven is not so different from here that it will be unrecognizable.</b><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> There are trees and flowers, instruments and music, a climate, things to do, places to live, and people (some we know and others we do not).</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> The same Creator who made earth also made Heaven. We will recognize many of the same features. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><b>3. </b></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Memories from earth are not erased in Heaven.</b><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> Our minds don’t suddenly develop a sort of "earth amnesia" where everything we did here simply slips from our minds. We will know abundantly more than we do now, but we will not forget the people and memories. My mom was not present with us, but she had not ceased thinking about me.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><b>4. </b></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">I want to go there one day. </b><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Perhaps this was the greatest truth that began to sink in. Death lost its sting with the death of my mom. Heaven was no longer the scary unknown anymore, but a real place with people I love waiting for me.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><b>5. </b></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">The message of the empty tomb not only set me free from the fear of death, but made me long for the day when I enter into Heaven.</b></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-tab-span"> </span> “<i>For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.”</i></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Philippians 1:21-23 ESV</span></i></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Oh the glorious empty tomb! The reminder that Jesus set me free from the very fear that I had been packing. Death won’t stop me from my freedom! Sickness won’t stop me from my freedom! My own sinful nature has been washed cleaned and I am free!</span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">One day I will have my turn. I will take my final breath this side of Heaven and step into the arms of my Saviour eternally. My feet placed on solid soil in the perfection of Heaven, where the light of God shines so brightly the sun will no longer be needed. I am here today, that much I know. But, the promise of my eternity is deeply embedded in my soul as the Holy Spirit reminds me of what is to come.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> I long for that day!</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">May you be reminded this Easter weekend, that Jesus paid the price for us to be able to enter a <b>very real</b>, very perfect Heaven.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> It is not a story of long ago and far away, it is fact pertaining to YOUR future. A future where not only Heaven will become real as you view it, but so will the embrace of God Almighty as He opens his arms and welcomes you in. </span></span></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">“O death, where is your victory?</span></i></div>
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<span class="indent-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="indent-1-breaks" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 0;"> </span><span class="text 1Cor-15-55" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; position: relative;">O death, where is your sting?”</span></span></i></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="text 1Cor-15-56" id="en-ESV-28758" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">The sting of death is sin, and <span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-28758B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-28758B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>the power of sin is the law.</span> <span class="text 1Cor-15-57" id="en-ESV-28759" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">But thanks be to God, <span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-28759C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-28759C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.</span></span></i></div>
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<i><span class="text 1Cor-15-57" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">1 Corinthians 15:55-57 </span></span></i></div>
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The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-8765091119420167792018-03-08T11:22:00.000-08:002018-03-08T11:22:25.112-08:00How You can Find Stability in an Unstable World (Audio clip)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh85sWlxnW8elmLu9yjU6TMDowb9j5rfKuaq0Jtjude69F5pVQDOo0e_yJ2FrPs21if_fltmScHUKrikPwsdE6WtHFU_-IuRBEFpSJsnv0DjHDUIGqOA6sby6bLfm5wo0Hoc_vgQE18_0c/s1600/pexels-photo-841286+%25281%2529.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh85sWlxnW8elmLu9yjU6TMDowb9j5rfKuaq0Jtjude69F5pVQDOo0e_yJ2FrPs21if_fltmScHUKrikPwsdE6WtHFU_-IuRBEFpSJsnv0DjHDUIGqOA6sby6bLfm5wo0Hoc_vgQE18_0c/s640/pexels-photo-841286+%25281%2529.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">In a world of instability and inconsistency we are beginning to see the effects of what that looks like as it creeps through the doors of the Church. Many of us are feeling uneasy about the future, and church somehow doesn't quite feel "safe" anymore. We all feel it, but what can we do about it?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Instead of pointing fingers, it is time to begin to look inwards to see what we can do before our younger generations (and us too) walk away from faith in the Almighty God. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Click <a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Fohiy6Eb2JQUxUJAfTh1ryH9vmdWGvJY/view?ts=5a9ec722" target="_blank">here</a> to listen to my sermon from February 24, 2018 where I address the state of the unstable Church, and how YOU can make a difference.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Links to Barna studies used in the sermon can be found here:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"<a href="https://www.barna.com/research/five-factors-changing-womens-relationship-with-churches/" target="_blank">Five Factors Changing Women's Relationships with Churches</a>"</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.barna.com/research/meet-love-jesus-not-church/" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Meet Those who 'Love Jesus, but not the Church'"</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://www.barna.com/research/atheism-doubles-among-generation-z/" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">"Atheism Doubles Among Generation Z"</span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Love,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sarah</span>The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-62901786528415506762018-03-06T22:16:00.000-08:002020-01-03T22:49:46.541-08:00A Powerful Prayer From an Aging Generation to You<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; line-height: normal;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5uSwkvp91J9pNfBKwjUPg9q-VMcxD4GPL7oYUmGCnDpgZqKD-5Am7bRa5SvRjR8b-pKMynXc_n78YVDMc-nK-sPV1PO6hPecPWKny1fs7kugBNnqVwrjV1hNVACj1BvMPsJAYvS2faYg/s1600/A+powerful+prayer+for+you.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="passing the baton for God' kingdom" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5uSwkvp91J9pNfBKwjUPg9q-VMcxD4GPL7oYUmGCnDpgZqKD-5Am7bRa5SvRjR8b-pKMynXc_n78YVDMc-nK-sPV1PO6hPecPWKny1fs7kugBNnqVwrjV1hNVACj1BvMPsJAYvS2faYg/s640/A+powerful+prayer+for+you.jpg" title="A prayer for the next generation" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span><span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I sat on the edge of the stage stairs overwhelmed by what I was witnessing. The presence of God in the room was so intense you could almost physically feel His hands at work. We were experiencing a revival within the community as women repented, and rededicated their lives to God declaring they were "all in" for Him. Deep emotional wounds were being healed, burdens were being laid down. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I was one of the women who was praying for the ladies at the front of the sanctuary as they needed it. I could feel the weariness of the last few days creeping in. I allowed my legs (and eyes) a much needed break as I sat down. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I was one of the speakers at the conference, and at the last minute God redirected my sermon to something entirely different as He needed to show up in a mighty way. And He most certainly didn’t disappoint! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">As I sat there breathing, praying, absorbing, I felt hands on my knees. I opened my eyes expecting someone requesting prayer, but instead I saw an elderly woman shuffling closer to me on her knees. Had she fallen and needed help? I was startled and not sure what to do. She climbed up close to my face and pulled me in tight, her soft grandmotherly skin pressed against my cheek. Then she began to speak...</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Her sweet voice was as soft as her skin, but brewing from deep within was the strength of God’s authority as she prayed over me. She thanked God for a new generation that was rising up who would be fearless for God.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">What happened next utterly ripped my world in pieces and simultaneously built it back with tenfold strength.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">She gave a grand commission for my generation to take the next generation and raise them as hers had once done for us. Hers was a generation whose bodies are growing weary. She was passing the responsibilities of living boldly, and walking righteously in our faith onto a younger generation whose feet are still able to run with every step, and whose arms can still wage war on the battlefield. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">In an instant there was a passing of a baton from one tired relay runner to a fresh one ready for a sprint. Her stretch of the race was coming to a close and she prayed for us as we grab the baton to run the next stretch before we too pass the baton sometime down the road.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This is the time my friends. The sermon God replaced my meager portion with was one of an “all in” type of a cry to his people. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-kerning: none;"><i>“Now therefore fear the Lord and serve him in sincerity and in faithfulness. Put away the gods that your fathers served beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord.</i></span><span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; line-height: normal;"><b><i> </i></b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;"><i>And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord,</i><b><i> choose this day whom you will serve</i></b><i>, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. </i><b><i>But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”</i></b><i> </i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">(Joshua 24:14-15 emphasis mine)</span></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Choose this day, whom you will serve. The gods of the world, of the one and only Yahweh.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b>The commission I received was not just for me, it was for all of you.</b> There is a world outside our doors hungry for a message of hope. A generation younger than yours who is desperate to see what faith in action in looks like. Our children are watching intently to see how we will respond and carry ourselves if we say we have Christ in our lives. There is little room for error, and the stakes are high. Eternity is a long time to pay for the mistakes of not getting it right.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Whether you have children or not, it is up to us as the Church to walk beside a younger generation and strengthen them as they find their footing within God’s kingdom. It is a most high calling, and not one to be taken lightly.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Will you carry the next generation on your shoulders until they are firmly planted on the Rock? Will you join me as we draw our swords and shields to defend their young spirits from the darts of the enemy? Will you speak with boldness rooted in the word of God even when it does not win the approval of those around you, seeking only for the approval of God himself?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Are YOU all in?</span></span><br />
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Love,<br />
Sarah<br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">photo credit: Juan Pablo @ Pexels.com</span></span></div>
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The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-654083421722489368.post-71640697115164463482018-02-01T22:07:00.003-08:002018-02-04T14:48:45.642-08:00Three Minute Theology (video): why praying for God's direction isn't as important as this...Hi friends,<br />
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I am finishing up my class right now which means studying for my final and very little time for writing. *sigh* BUT, I wanted to share a quick snippet of something that has been on my heart with you, so I grabbed my phone and made a quick video (way faster than typing and editing!).<br />
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I hope you enjoy this quick three”ish” minute theology on why we need to choose to know God’s love before we seek His path for our day.<br />
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Side note: thank you YouTube for choosing this awkward face as the freeze-frame for the thumbnail! Yikes!<br />
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See you when my final is over!<br />
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<br />The Backyard Missionaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302927670453978583noreply@blogger.com0